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Wednesday, July 13, 2011

ennui

apathetic
unmotivated
tired
drained

school has gosh darn worn me out!

its driving me nuts cause lately i have had zero energy
not cool
i need a job
i need to study for finals
i need to write my research paper
i need something to push me and to get me off of my lazy bum
quick
at least the semester is almost over
and i have met some pretty great people recently
who will make the seven weeks that i will be stuck here for much more bearable
******
i think it is quite peculiar that when we are little all we want to be is a growned-up
but once we get all the responsibility that comes with it we realize how incredibly great we had it then
our biggest stressors were making sure we were inside by dark 
and getting to see our favorite saturday morning cartoons

sometimes i wish that we were like benjamin button
getting younger all the time
nevertheless
there is a beauty that comes with being able to take care of yourself and making things happen in your own life 
and not depending on anyone but yourself
of course we all need help in this life
but that beauty comes from knowing when you need that help
and
when you need to just buckle down and figure it out for yourself

life is
complicated and messy
beautiful and hideous
difficult and simple
fragile and robust
amazing

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